So
today 1/7/13 started a very new and exciting chapter in my life. I really was
not planning today's events and it turned out to be the most exciting
day of my life without a mind altering substance. It all started last
night while talking to a very good friend on the phone. Her name is
Tammy. Tammy has always been a very important person in my
life despite the fact that there has been periods of our life where we
have went long periods of time without communicating. You see, she is
one of them people that fall under the category, "life time" of the
quote "people come in your life for a reason, season, or a life time."
OK....So this is how it all started!!
I
have had family hear visiting in Florida for the new York for the past
week. Well me and Tammy were talking about all of us going to church
while there hear. Well, during the day on sat I was thinking to my self,
maybe I will get up and go to church tomorrow but I kept saying to
myself, I don't really have church shoes to look presentable enough to
attend church, in my eyes anyway. Well, a few years ago I moved
to Jacksonville Florida for a really short period of time. At the time I
moved to Jacksonville, I could not take all of my belongings with me so
I decided to leave a box of shoes behind for a later date to return and
get them.
Well I did not stay in Jacksonville a very
long time because it did not work out the way I thought it would so I
had to return to my home hear in Mims Florida So I totally forgot about
the box of shoes that I left behind which sat in storage for two longs
years. All this time I never remembered that I had that box of shoes in
storage for that entire time. I figure I just did not have the proper
shoes to ware to church and during this period I never bought any proper
church shoes thinking I just would not need to ware that type of shoe
because I didn't attend church or any other events that called for that
type of attire.
So this is where it starts to get a little freaky!!
Saturday me
and my mother was in the kitchen talking and the conversation comes up
about me thinking about going to church but me not having any proper
shoes to ware. Well as we are talking and making food to eat, all of a
sudden it pops in my head that I had that box of shoes in storage. After
two years of forgetting that box of shoes was in storage, It suddenly
comes to me that I have that box of shoes in storage. So I say to my mom
in an exciting voice, "mom, don't I still have that box of shoes in
storage?" and she even forgot her self that they were there, so we both
rush to the storage to make sure they were there and lo-and-behold there
is my box of shoes sitting there all dusty from being in storage for
two years.
Again after two years I suddenly thought of
these shoes after contemplation should I go to church because of not
having proper shoes to attend. So I dust of my shoes off and put them
aside to make plans to go to church.
But!!!
Remember
me and Tammy was talking about how I should get up and go to church
with the family while there in town for their visit. So I get back on
the phone with Tammy and tell her about me finding my shoes after two
years. So now she is saying she was thinking about the whole thing of me
going to church before we even started the conversation and something
was telling her that I really needed to attend church with my family
while they were here. Tammy has really been living the holy life for the
past year or so now so she gets these premonitions about certain things
she is getting from god, the holy spirit you know, having her feel
something heavy on her heart. So this was one of them for her. It was
heavy on her heart that I should attend church with my family while they
were hear. She said she did not know exactly why but the spirit was
telling her something was in store for me at church this time and I
should really go.
My thinking was,,OK, I found the
shoes after two years suddenly while thinking of going to church, now
Tammy is telling me the spirit is telling her I should go to church. But
I still put a stipulation on weather to go or not only if I could
get in touch with the members of my family to make sure they were going
so I would not have to go alone., but that night for some reason my
family was not answering their phones. I mean none of them and I had
been calling them since they been hear and they always answered, but not
this night.
So,,I told Tammy that I will keep trying
but if I don't get in touch with them I probably would not go. Tammy is
in my ear, No hon,,(that's what we call each other for the last 20 years
no matter who we were with, what was going on in our life or how long
we went without talking to each other, we still call each other hon this
very day,,lol) well she's like no, just go even if you don't get in
touch with them go,,get up and go by yourself. So before we get off the
phone for the night, I tell her I will keep trying to get in touch with
my family, I still might go if I don't. We hang up and I lay down for
the night.
I wake up the next morning about 8:30am and
sit at the corner of my bed and get back on the phone and try and get in
touch with my family. What-to-ya-know, I still cant get anyone to
answer the phone, so I'm like wow!! wth, I try for like an hour, and
nothing. So for about 15 min, I sit on the corner of my bed and just
think. silence, I say nothing, like I'm meditating or something. I did
not want to go to church alone. It kept eating at me though to get up
and go, in my heart I felt I should just go. Especially after the two
signs of the finding of the shoes and Tammy in my ear about
her premonitions. So I make the decision to go, get up take my shower,
get dress and go.
Now I'm sitting in church pretty
relaxed and satisfied after having to walk in by my self and being
nervous. Right from the beginning I'm feeling great that I'm there. The
mood is so comfortable and beautiful from the choir singing, the praying
going on. It just felt so right. So after about 15 to 20 min things
quite down for a min and the choir starts singing this beautiful song
that really touched me. The ladies voice was so strong beautiful and
piercing. I could not only hear that song but I could feel that song
deep inside my soul. It was one of the most touching moments of my life.
And I soon realized that I was feeling the spirit of the lord. I start
to shed a tear but I'm trying to hold it because I don't want anyone to
see me crying. don't know why I was thinking like that because as I
looked around everyone was crying. That's how powerful that song was and
how strong the spirit was present. At that moment, that very moment I
knew why the days events occurred the way they did. The lord was trying
to tell me that it was time to let go and let god.
The
preacher starts to preach and preaches one of the most powerful sermons I
have ever heard from a preacher. His message seemed like it was
directly completely geared at me. I felt like I was the only one in that
church and he was preaching only to me. I knew that my life as I knew
it was over. I knew my life was about to change for the better. I knew I
had to start walking in the faith of the lord. I know that it is surely
time for a change.
After the church service was over, I
became a member of the church. I was accompanied by a lady of the
church to meet the preacher. We talked and I became a member of The
Greater Saint James Church under the guidance of paster Keith. I
also have plans to be baptized in a few weeks.
I have
been living my life on the edge with all the things I have done in my
life. I always said why this and why that. Why does this not work or
that not work. Why have I had to struggle all my life. I always tried to
answer these questions with acts of rebellion or acts of doing
something I think would change my situation. why, why, why all my life.
Now its time to do something different. Actually do what I knew was
right all my life and did not want to because I wanted to continue to
have fun in ways I knew was wrong.
I'm done with that
now and I'm ready to give my life to the lord and let him guide me for
the rest of my life and I'm so excited about it.
Today's events were the beginning of a new life, my new life. and it feels so, so, good...
~God Bless you all~
